Sam-less Days

Sam left yesterday morning. A familiar, yet unsettling feeling followed me around all day. I guess I thought that I had this one in the bag since our last deployment was a whole year long. The only problem is, that was 2 years ago, and we were in a long distance relationship already, so I think that may have made it easier. I didn’t have his dirty socks to find around my house, or have to clean up the mess he made that morning in the sink with the toothpaste. Those are the things that make so mad when he’s home, but now..can you imagine feeling that knot rise in your throat, then tears coming out of your eyes all because you found a dirty sock in the couch cushion?! Then even more sadness comes when I realize that Sam is missing a sock. Then, for some reason, maybe I’m crazy, I start to think how the sock might feel without it’s match.  Then I start to feel sorry for the lonely sock. Then I say to myself, “I feel like that lonely sock” as I cry and hold Sam’s dirty sock. It’s all so pathetic, and luckily the weird stuff seems to subside after that first awful day.

Today was better. Sam isn’t traveling anymore and is now settled in and that makes me feel better because I know his legs hurt so bad on the plane and for some reason I kept thinking about that.  So now the countdown starts! (Sarah – remember when Sam would leave, I would always make those colorful countdown calendars and post them in my cube and we would mark off each day..that was fun.)  I have plenty to keep me busy this time around (but I’ll discuss that later), so hopefully this one goes by fast.

Oh, and apparently Osama Bin Laden is dead now. It took 10 years, but justice has finally been served. I wish that his death meant the death of the monster we continue to fight and our loved ones could come home, but unfortunately there is still work to be done! But this is, indeed, a great victory for America.

2 thoughts on “Sam-less Days

  1. So this blog was very sad but I had to laugh a little when I pictured you getting sad for the lonely other sock and then holding it to you and then I for sad again when I read/remembered the fun colorful calendars. Shew! What a roller coaster of emotions…even for the reader. You are right Amber, you will have a lot of distractions this time around..and one of them is this blog!! (Which I love) so try not to be too down in the dumps ( I just realized how odd that saying is..who actually gets down in a dump?? Except homeless people and then they need to get down in the dumps to eat!) Anyways I love ya and can’t wait to see you again!

  2. I love you… I cried when I read this… Your words are lonely and beautiful, and I commend you for sharing them.. I wish for you that the time will pass like a great nights sleep, and that morning would bring him home. Xo

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